My Weekend Happenings

MOVIES:

My father and I went to see Appaloosa this weekend. This movie was apparently Ed Harris’ dream project and with that in mind I figured on it being a better film. Whereas a movie like Open Range was slow moving but kept me watching and interested throughout, Appaloosa was just simply slow moving . Harris’ character named Virgil Cole is called a “gun man”. He’s hired by towns to come in, act as marshal, and get rid of bad guys. In this case Jeremy Irons is the bad guy, named Bragg. Cole has a partner he works with, a former military man named Everett Hitch played by Viggo Mortensen. Everett Hitch is the most interesting character in the movie as he carries an 8 gauge shot gun throughout the story, always having it at rest upon his right shoulder.

Mortensen and Harris love the 2008 Wii version of "Duck Hunt"

Appaloosa is the town that hires Cole to come in and clean out Bragg. Good versus evil, the story is as simple as that. The thing that made Appaloosa so unappealing to me is that Virgil Cole is just such an awkward character. First, he’s old, much older than most of the cowboys I’m used to watching and that includes John Wayne in True Grit. Second, he’s a seemingly stupid and awkward man, finding his words hard to come by and often stuttering in conversation as he stumbles to think of the word he’s searching for to say. The uncomfortable look on other characters faces as Cole stumbles through talk is the same look I felt myself having in the theater watching the movie. Mostly because Appaloosa never gives any back-story to their characters, and therefore never really explains why Cole is the way he is. Third, the relationship he has with Allie French (Renee Zellweger) is just plain odd. She’s a lady who is constantly attracted to the alpha male. It’s an infatuation that changes during the film as new alpha males come onto the scene from Cole, to a nemeses of his, and then finally to Bragg himself. Cole is so stubborn in his own way that he loves Allie regardless of the fact that she leaves him more than once over the two-hour film for other men. Stranger too is the fact that Cole is about thirty or forty years Allie’s senior.

Hitch is the strong silent type, probably the better man than Cole but he’s been so obedient through the years that he has a sort of noble lap dog tendency. Viggo sports a sort of Don Quixote moustache throughout the movie that has a coolness to it I liken to what Val Kilmer brought to the Doc Holliday character in 1993’s Tombstone. Hitch is the only character in the movie that Allie French goes for who doesn’t seem to ever be the alpha male. Perhaps it’s not strength she sees in him, but the fact that he’s a better man overall.

There are two or three good fight scenes in the film, the best being a shoot out at a Mexican jailhouse owned by the cousin of one of Cole’s enemies. Virgil and Everett face off against five men, two downstairs in the jailhouse doorway, and two firing at them from above in the windows. Everybody gets shot and goes down and when the dust settles a shot-up Everett whispers to a bloodied Cole,
“That was fast.” To which Cole replies,
“Yea, everyone knew how to shoot!”

Mostly, I found Appaloosa to be slower moving than action packed. My dad grew up on a lot of westerns and he seemed to enjoy the movie more than I did, both of us thinking and saying aloud that it was “only okay”. I’m a fan of recent westerns like Tombstone, Open Range and 3:10 Yuma, so if you see yourself being a fan of movies like those perhaps you want to wait for Appaloosa to come out in Red Box before you spend over $20 to see if at a theatre. (That is if you buy tickets and popcorn…)

This Did NOT Happen

SPORTS:

The only way I’m going to be intimated by the Anaheim Angels is if they win tonight’s game and we go back to Anaheim. After seeing that they could only muster five runs last night and it took them twelve innings to do that, I think they’re done. Also, K-Rod threw like forty pitches last night, there’s almost no chance they’ll use him tonight in a tight one. (Of course Papelbon may nt be able to go for us...) Shields is an excellent setup guy but he pitched a lot last night too. Arredondo has great stuff! I hope to not see him again in this series. He is the one Angel out of that bullpen who scares me. Mike Napoli may be growing into the type of offensive catchers that teams everywhere are looking for. The question is could he keep it up with 400-500 at bats in the regular season? The Red Sox need to pitch around him now- two homers and three runs scored last night…the Angels as a team scored 5 runs. Four of those runs were because of Napoli (2: two run home run, 1: one run home run, 1: go ahead run in extra innings.). I really don’t care if this guy didn’t do much in the regular season- he’s hitting now and if you’re going to pitch around Teixeira and Guerrero, than pitch around him too!!! Just do anything it takes to win.

Josh Beckett is not himself this year. We get it. The TBS announcers like to rub it in to make a story out of nothing. Teams should still be afraid of Beckett in the post season. Very afraid! Heck, teams should be afraid of any pitcher on this staff in the post season. Lester was phenomenal in game one, Matszuaka prides himself on pitching better with guys on base and Wakefield is a force to be reckoned with in the post season!! (Boone’s 2003 homer not withstanding.)

While I’m hatin’ on TBS- would somebody please release the testicles of the color guy? I can’t stand listening to his voice! It needs to be deeper!! The thing is, he’s got some interesting things to say- he can guess what the pitchers are going to do and what the batters are planning, but whenever he speaks there’s a cringe in my spine. I miss Jerry Remy. Don Orsillo is doing the Tampa games; will the ALCS be on TBS too? If so than maybe Orsillo will be announcing for the Sox again! And Harold Reynolds will do the color! I liked Reynolds when he was on Baseball Tonight.

Somebody assassinate Frank Caliendo too. Frank TV? You got one sort of funny character: John Madden. Every body else sucks- you know who does better impressions? Daryl Hammond on SNL. I would rather watch Daryl TV over your shitty show!!! Not Much Better

Opposite of Funny

Great game last night though---very much a playoff nail biter. Now that we let them get excited- lets make them cry tonight! Come on boys! LETS GO RED SOX! (bum bum bum bum bum) LETS GO RED SOX! (bum bum bum bum bum) LETS GO RED SOX!

Randy Moss says "only YOU can prevent forest fires"

And big props to the Patriots for their win yesterday against the San Francisco 49ers. I’ll admit when they went down early on I had visions of there being a Miami repeat, but Cassel made it all go away with that bomb down the field to a wide open Randy Moss. Best line of the day? Randy Cross from CBS:

“Randy Moss against the single coverage likes to say; I’ve I’m even I’m leavin’”

Yea- Cross…I’m sure Randy Moss says that. In fact, I’m certain that Randy Moss has EVER talked to you in your life. Do me a favor and just shut up. Cassel

MISC.

I’ve been drinking some really great drip coffee lately. Newman’s Own French Roast is the best drip coffee I’ve had….maybe EVER. When I get that one-cup coffee maker for my wedding from my sister I can’t wait to buy boxes full of the Newman’s Own blends. They’re Delicious, and they’re fair-trade organic. It’s like having my very own Coffee Exchange right there in my kitchen!!!

Restaurants go through little annoying phases. The phase that is so five minutes ago is the description of “chipotle”. People are too used to the idea of having everything “chipotle” now. I’ve recognized the newest craze. It started at little gourmet restaurants, and then I found it at California Pizza kitchen, and now I saw commercial for it at Chili’s. Yes folks- now not only can you get bacon on your sandwiches, now it’s “apple-wood smoked bacon!” Sounds delicious right? Know what it tastes like?

BACON

Don’t be fooled- it’s just another way to make your taste buds tingle by looking at it and now I’m annoyed by the description of it. Once Chili’s gets a hold of a craze, you know it’s time to ditch it. Here’s a lunch item featuring all the flavors of the week:

Crisp romaine lettuce, plump red tomatoes and red onion slices accentuate the freshly grilled chipotle chicken and apple-wood smoked bacon in a hearty wheat wrap with a generous portion of low-fat honey mustard Dijon.

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm sounds delicious. Sounds like something I can get ANYWHERE. Don’t be fooled by good marketing techniques people. It’s all the same food!